Cum One, Cum All, and join the ultimate shenanigans as Sloppy Vltava celebrates ten years of river adventures with the biggest and craziest trip yet!

In 2026 I'm celebrating the Tenth Analversary by adding extra days, so we can pack more fun into everything! As usual there will be a limit of 50 people!

We'll start by meeting on Sunday July 12th, 2026, in Prague, where we'll have a Super Sloppy Hash Trail in the afternoon so that everyone can meet and mingle and get to know one another (if you don't already know each other, and a group this size there's bound to be a few people you don't know)!

We'll then have an evening of drinking practice, of course, because what's the point of being in Prague if we're not going to invade some unsuspecting bars and turn them into impromptu Hash Pubs?

Then on Monday July 13th we'll take a party train to Vyssi Brod. Once in Vyssi Brod we'll check ourselves into our cabins, and then hit the bar. Monday will be a very relaxing and easy day :-)

On Tuesday July 14th we'll have another Sloppy Hash Trail, followed by an adventure afternoon with a rope park, bobsled track, and options to paddle board on a lake. For those who don't want (or are physically unable) to do trail, there are buses that can take you there as well.

Wednesday July 15th will be Day One on the river! We will have a combination of 2 person and 4 person inflatable boats, as these have been proven over the years to be the most stable and easiest option for novice river goers to handle safely. Once on the river we'll meander our way (via the traditional Squirrel Shit and Lunchtime Bridge Jump stops), along with floating Mojito bars for those who are into that kind of thing, to our next camp, where we will again have cabins for the night.

Thursday July 16th is Day Two on the river, a shorter day on the river (technically anyway), where we make our way via the Viking Lunch Stop (and hash trail) and Naked Weir to Cesky Krumlov.

Friday July 17th will be the first of TWO DAYS where we'll take a break from the river. This will be a FREE DAY, where people can do whatever they wish! If enough people are interested I can arrange a tour of the local graphite mine, most likely people will spend the day exploring Cesky Krumlov, as people always tell me they wish they had more time there! Well, 2026 is the time your wishes will be granted!

Saturday July 18th will be a TRAIL DAY, so expect a super awesome Sloppy Trail, as for once I'll have had a whole day to plan and set it, followed by LUNCH covered by Hash Cash, and an evening DINNER, also covered by Hash Cash!

On Sunday July 19th we'll be back on the river, starting with a gentle paddle through the center of Cesky Krumlov and four weirs before we stop for brunch, then continuing on to our final camp where we will have a mega circle to discuss all the events of the trip and punish people accordingly!

Finally, on Monday July 20th we will be on the river for the final day, making our way to Borsov nad Vltavou where we'll take the train back to Prague. There will of course be beer on the train for those that want it, and on arrival in Prague there will be an option to continue to a bar or two for final drinks before everyone heads off home!

Here are some of the questions I get asked most often about Sloppy Vltava, along with the questions I EXPECT to get asked this time round...

1 - How will the cabins work?

There have, in fairness, been issues with cabin allocation in the past - issues mainly caused by me being lazy and not bothering to actually ALLOCATE people into cabins.

But not this time - I already have the list of cabins and how many beds there are in each room in each camp, and 2 months before the event everyone who has registered will be emailed to express preference for roommates. There will be official ROOM CAPTAINS, and these will be the people I will speak to at the camps when I get keys - they can then go and grab their allocated cabin mates and go to the rooms.

This, I'm sure everyone will agree, will be much easier and less stressful than trying to work out who is rooming with who when we're all drunk already!

2 - What about boat allocation? That's also a shitshow sometimes.

Again, this is a thing I'm aware of and am determined to do properly this time!

Most likely we'll have ten four-person rafts and five 2-person canoes.

There will be official BOAT CAPTAINS, who will each be allocated a specific boat that will be their boat for the week. I will allocate the boat captains based on people who have experience on the river - that way we should be able to avoid having a boat full of virgins paddling round in circles!

Said captains will be asked to choose their day one crew in advance, then they can make sure they are taking care of those specific people in the morning, ensuring luggage is taken to the correct place, that everyone has life-vest and paddle, and helping to ensure a smooth launch without lot's of discussion about who is going in which boat with which people!

I will then speak to each boat captain in the evening to ensure they have a crew picked for the next day on the river, and that their chosen crew is aware of who their captain will be!

3 - How will the adventure day work?

I will set a hash trail from the Vyssi Brod camp to the nearby town where there are various things people can do - rope park, bobsled track, renting paddle boards on the lake, and probably some other things besides. You will all then have the freedom to choose your own plan for the day, although there will be an official meeting point and time for us all to head back to Vyssi Brod.

For those not wanting to do trail, there is public transport available going to the same place :-)

4 - Can you please explain how the luggage transfer works so I don't do a Messiah and lost my stuff?

It's very simple - at each camp there is a luggage collection point, which will be staffed by a person wearing a yellow shirt. I will approach him first of all and give him my name and tell him how many people are in the group. He will then write my name on tags and attach them to big white sacks where we should store our bags.

If you don't see my name on a bag, DON'T PUT YOUR STUFF IN THAT BAG! I will also ask the room captains to chaperone their cabin mates each day to ensure that luggage is put in the right place, but if in doubt, ASK SOMEONE BEFORE LEAVING YOUR STUFF!

5 - Do I need a tent?

No tent is required as we'll be staying in cabins. You WILL need a sleeping bag for a couple of the camps, but no other camping type equipment is required.

6 - How much money do I need to bring?

You will need to bring enough cash for the following;

Anything you might consume in Vyssi Brod

Anything you might want to buy/do on the Adventure Day

Beers along the river - some are covered, but not all
Meals along the river - while one lunch and one dinner are covered in Cesky Krumlov, all other meals are pay as you go.

Beer is generally around 2 Euros, perhaps slightly more by July next year. Meals are available in most places for 7-10 Euros. All camps have some sort of restaurant, and there are plenty of places along the river to get food too.

7 - Do I need cash or can I pay with credit card?

There are SOME places that accept cards, and more places are accepting them each year. However, the majority of places we stop DO NOT TAKE CARDS. So you will need to bring cash along.

There is an ATM in Vyssi Brod, and there are some in Cesky Krumlov. In between you are unlikely to find anywhere to get cash if you don't have it with you.

8 - Can I pay in GBP, USD or Euros?

In a word, NO! While some places MIGHT accept payment in Euros, they will give you an awful exchange rate to do so, so it's far better to have Czech Koruna with you. This can be gotten from any ATM you come across, but beware of ATM's owned by a company called EURONET, as they have many different ways in which to rip you off!